- I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
- I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
- Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
- If I throw a stick, will you leave?
- Does your train of thought have a caboose?
- Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
- Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
- Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
- See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
- Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
- A woman’s favorite position is CEO.
- I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
- A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
- Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven’t fallen asleep yet.
- Can I trade this job for what’s behind door number 1?
- I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
- Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
- Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I’m wrong.
- Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
- Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
- Never trust a dog to watch your food.
- Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
- If At First You Don’t Succeed, Blame Someone Else And SeekCounseling.
- You’re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Sarcastic One Liners
BOY : May I hold your hand? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! BOY : You love me... GIRL : If w...
Albert Einstein is best mind known to human. He was the most Intellectual person ever. But still he had a funny side to him. Following are s...
Who says today’s kids aren’t smart? Well, some of them are! I wish I’d thought of this ... At a high school in Montana a group of stu...
1. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. 2. I ...
Q - Why is it called a TV set when there's only one? Q - If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as ...
1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 3. Going to church doesn...
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much lea...
The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites. Just twenty seconds worth of fuel remained when Apollo 11's lunar module landed on...
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in...