- “No God — No Peace. Know God — Know Peace.”
- “Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!”
- “Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.”
- “Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!”
- An ad for St.Joseph’s Episcopal Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.”
- When the restaurant next to the Lutheran Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, “Open Sundays,” the church reciprocated with its own message: “We are open on Sundays, too.”
- “Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons — come hear one!”
- A singing group called “The Resurrection” was scheduled to sing at a church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, “The Resurrection is postponed.”
- “People are like tea bags — you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.”
- “God so loved the world that He did not send a committee.”
- “Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!”
- “When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out alright.”
- “Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.”
- “Fight truth decay — study the Bible daily.”
- “How will you spend eternity — Smoking or Non-smoking?”
- “Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives”:
- “Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.”
- “It is unlikely there’ll be a reduction in the wages of sin.”
- “Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.”
- “If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.”
- “If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.”
- “Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.”
- “This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?”
- “Forbidden fruit creates many jams.”
- “In the dark? Follow the Son.”
- “Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.”
- “If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.”
Monday, November 3, 2008
Funny Church Signs
BOY : May I hold your hand? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! BOY : You love me... GIRL : If w...
Albert Einstein is best mind known to human. He was the most Intellectual person ever. But still he had a funny side to him. Following are s...
Who says today’s kids aren’t smart? Well, some of them are! I wish I’d thought of this ... At a high school in Montana a group of stu...
1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 3. Going to church doesn...
1. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. 2. I ...
Q - Why is it called a TV set when there's only one? Q - If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as ...
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much lea...
The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites. Just twenty seconds worth of fuel remained when Apollo 11's lunar module landed on...
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in...
Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is...