- I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
- Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
- Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
- Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
- Are You Andy or Barney?
- I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
- You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
- I pay your salary!
- Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
- Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
- I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are.
- When the Officer says "Gee ....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"?
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Or else get a proper crack :)