Funny Tale of a Lost Senior Citizen

When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old man sitting on a park bench sobbing his eyes out.  I stopped and asked him what was wrong.

He told me, 'I have a 22 year old wife at home. She rubs my back every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee.' I continued, 'Well, then why are you crying?'

He added, 'She makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favourite biscuits, cleans the house and then watches sports TV with me for the rest of the afternoon.' I said, 'Well, why are you crying?'

He said, 'For dinner she makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favourite dessert and then we cuddle until the small hours.' I inquired, 'Well then, why in the world would you be crying?'

He replied, 'I can't remember where I live.'

Installation With Antivirus

Boy: Hey can i touch your software?
Girl: first show me your hardware?
.
.
.
Boy: can i install it in your system?
Girl: Okay…… but cover it with anti virus, then install it.

Double Protection

The perfect system to avoid condom accident, use double condom with chilly powder in between, if outer breaks she will know, if inner breaks you will know.

Loose Some Wait Honey

Boy: Do you know you would look more sexy with one kg less.

Girl- Ok Sweatheart, I'll loose it as soon as possible.

Boy: In my opinion all your clothes weight exactly one kg.

Games And Girls

At 18 a lady is like football
22 men behind her.

At 28 basket ball.
10 men behind her,

At 38 golf ball.
1 man behind her,

At 48 table tennis ball,
1 man pushing her to another.

God Bless You

It's the thing that satisfies
your mind, body & soul!

Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!

It's called Prayer!

God bless your naughty mind.

Allow Me To Kiss Your Lips

Allow me everyday

"to kiss your lips,
to feel your teeth,
to feel your tongue."
and your SMILE!

This is your friend "PEPSODENT" reminding you to brush your teeth,Twice a day :)

OMG!

Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher:

"can kids of our age have kids?"

Teacher replied " NO Never!!"

Boy said to girl :
"see i told you not to worry!!!!".

Thats Good Bad Luck

What is the perfect example of both Good & Bad Luck?

The naughty wind blows the girl's skirt high (Good luck)

but at the same time Dust falls into the boy's eyes (Bad luck)

Which Is Easy???


Dirty Mind

A short thing
its get longer as you hold it
& pass between woman's breast
& enters into a small hole
What is it?





Its car seatbelt 

Generation Gap


Facebooking


A Funny True Story

Police Officer Bryant found a perfect hiding place for watching for speeding motorists.
One day, the officer was amazed when everyone was under the speed limit, so Bryant investigated and found the problem.  10 year old Dennis was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said "Radar Trap Ahead." A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy's accomplice, another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading "Tips" and a bucket at his feet, full of change.

Think positive

Boy1: Meet my wife Tina
Boy2. Oh! I know her
Boy1: How?
Boy2: we were caught sleeping together
Boy1: What the hell?
Boy2. During lecture in maths class


Who Knows Horsepower Like He Does


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