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Saturday, September 15, 2007

Words Women Use

  1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
  2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
  3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
  4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
  5. Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
  6. That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
  7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you’re welcome.
  8. Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F@!K YOU!
  9. Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?” For the woman’s response, refer to #3.

6 comments:

  1. Oh, that's just brilliant.

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  2. Where did you get that dictionary! I have been searching for that same book for years! I honestly didn't believe they made one, but you have it! I got to get me one! Every word has the correct definition! -Thanks!

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  3. There are only two words that can be used to fight the cryptic nature of you women.

    "Detached garage"

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  4. DA??????
    You's telling me???
    I have been on the WRONG RECEIVING side of one and all of 'em!!!!
    DAAA!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. May I disagree with #2?

    Five minutes is a minute when you've been given five more minutes to watch the game...

    The rest, couldn't agree more.

    ReplyDelete

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