15 Crazy Things to Do While Shopping

Got dragged to go shopping with your spouse? Some wonderfully creative things to do when you become utterly bored:

  • Take 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s carts when they are not looking.
  • Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
  • Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to tampons section.
  • Walk up to an employee and tell her in an official tone, “Code 3? in housewares….. and watch what happened.
  • Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on lay-by.
  • Move a ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
  • Set up a tent in the camping department and tell shoppers that you would invite them in if they’ll bring pillows from the bedding department.
  • When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”
  • Looked right into the security camera; useit as a mirror, pick your nose, and eat it.
  • While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
  • Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.
  • In the auto department, practice the “Madonna look” using different size funnels.
  • Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yell “PICK ME!” “PICK ME!”
  • When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream “NO! NO! It’s those voices again!!!
  • Go into a fitting room, shut the door, wait a while; then yell, very loudly, “There is no toilet paper in here!”

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