Benefits Of Growing Older

  1. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
  2. People call at 9 P.M. and ask, "Did I wake you?"
  3. You can eat dinner at 4:00 PM.
  4. You can live without sex but not without glasses.
  5. You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
  6. You have a party and the neighbours don't even realize it.
  7. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks in the room.
  8. You sing along with the elevator music.
  9. Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
  10. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
  11. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.

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