- Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
- Hey, you must've been doin' about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job!
- You don't happen to have any beer in your car do ya?
- You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
- Did you happen to attend the "Barney Fife" Police Academy?
- Wow, You look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's night stand.
- I bet I could grab that gun before you finish writing my ticket.
- So, uh, you on the take, or what?
- Those sirens are hurting my ears, turn them off or I am not speaking to you.
- So what if I was speeding, whatcha gonna do about it Mr. Hotshot?
- Gee, officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
- Aren't you the guy from the village people?
- Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay just so one of us does.
- I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes I know there is no other car around, that's how far they are ahead of me.
- Sorry I can't hear you over the radio. No I am not turning it down, I love this song. Either speak up or just leave me alone.
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