When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.
Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.
Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already forgotten what happened.
Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?"
Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"
Men accept compliments much better than women do. Example: "Mitch, you look great." Mitch: "Thanks." On the other side: "Ruth, you look great." Ruth: "I do? Must be the lighting."
When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
When four or more women get together, they talk about men.