What did the gangster’s son tell his dad when he failed his examination?
” Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I never told them anything !! “
What’s the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.
When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn’t work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
A little boy went up to his father and asked : "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from ?"
His father replied : ” Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, because I still have mine. “
Jimmy’s teacher sent a note home to his mother, saying : ” Jimmy seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about girls. “
The mother wrote back the next day : ” If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his father ! “
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles per year.
Another study found Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of beer a year.
That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Great for my group at the senior center where I work.