- Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.
- White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
- Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
- Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
- Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
- Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
- France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica . No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
- Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
- George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
- Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
- 85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
- Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
- Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.
- Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
- Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States .
- Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.
- Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
- Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
- Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches with only 3 illegitimate children.
- New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035.
- IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
- Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Headlines From 2050
Tags: funny lists
BOY : May I hold your hand? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! BOY : You love me... GIRL : If w...
Albert Einstein is best mind known to human. He was the most Intellectual person ever. But still he had a funny side to him. Following are s...
Who says today’s kids aren’t smart? Well, some of them are! I wish I’d thought of this ... At a high school in Montana a group of stu...
1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 3. Going to church doesn...
1. I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. 2. I ...
Q - Why is it called a TV set when there's only one? Q - If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as ...
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much lea...
The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites. Just twenty seconds worth of fuel remained when Apollo 11's lunar module landed on...
NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they...
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in...