You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable, or get married
and wish you were dead.
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted".
Next day, she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have mine!"
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
A woman is incomplete until she is married.
Then she is finished.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don’t know son, I’m still paying."
-A young son asked, "Is it true Dad, some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her?
"Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
- Then there was a woman who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."
- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say — talk in your sleep.
- Just think, if it weren’t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
- First guy says, "My wife’s an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You’re lucky, mine’s still alive."
- A Woman’s Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, to understand a man, to Love and to forgive him, and for patience, for his moods.
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I’ll just beat him to death"
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