The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by The California Department of Transportation's driving school (read Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)
Q Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at The same time?
A The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q When driving through fog, what should you use?
A Your car.
Q What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
Q What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A The color.
Q How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A Heavy psychedelics.
Q What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A Carry loaded weapons.