TedsWoodworking Plans and Projects

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Humor Quotes

It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
- Rami Belson

"It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower or vacuum cleaner."
---Ben Bergor

"I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer. Then it hit me. "
- Unknown

"People have the right to be stupid. Some people abuse that privilege. "
- Unknown

"Don't play stupid with me...I'm better at it. "
- Unknown

"I dream of a better tomorrow... where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned "
- Unknown

"When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car. "
- Unknown

"I'm never wrong. I once thought I was wrong, turns out, I was mistaken. "
- Unknown

"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day."
- Whinnie The Pooh

"People that don't know me think I'm shy.People that do know me wish I were. "
- Unknown

1 comment:

  1. 'When I die, i want to die like my grandmother....'.

    This is actually a misquote of a joke by the late Bob Monkhouse, UK comedian. The original is: 'I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my father. Not screaming and terrified like his passengers.'


Current Hits